Inbetween

I'm not in school right now, and I will not be for about two weeks and that is excellent really, because I need to completely reinvent myself even though I'm not very sure what that entails. The only problem is I'm in between universities, jobs, lives...basically, and in between is such a weird place to be. I am sitting up tonight with all this paperwork, none of it is complex, but it is repetitive and boring, and outside the rain is pouring, and I can't help but think that I am taking it all too seriously. I tried for a few days to figure out what my favorite songs are and even that seemed somewhat trying, anyway, 9 Crimes (Damien Rice) still tugs at me every time, without fail, and I'm in love with him a little bit.
Do you remember that Evanescence song 'my immortal', do you remember the soft silence that it seemed to carry almost tangibly out of the speakers and into your reality, does your soul still gently sway to the sound of the keyboard, do you still find yourself wistfully returning to some places you haven't been in many years?
Maybe not anymore, but 9 crimes still feels like that to me.
I have been here before, I've been in between before, and I know that I do not like it very much; but, I like the downtime, the time to sit at bistro tables with my music, and a pencil, to write mindless sentences that mirror my transition, to attempt to dream of a future that is as far away as it is close. I'm a blessed ( or cursed) with a pensive disposition and that might be why I'm awake now, sitting under my rudely bright kitchen light, concluding that life is beautiful. I'm not very sure how exactly to work it, but it is beautiful.